Payton

Well I can honesty say that I am now taking my life hour by hour. I can't do the day by day anymore because it is too long and there are too many things to deal with.
I have a little girl that was diagnosed with RSS or Russell Silver Syndrome. We have been through a lot and we continue to deal with different situations on a daily basis. She is the cutest little girl you have ever seen. She is full of life and has a fire behind her eyes. She was lucky enough to get a little brother when she was 19 mons. old. She did great transitioning to her new brother and now that he is 9 months old, Brandon and I are blessed as parents that they are best friends.
Right now I am trying hard to become a good parent to her. She has to deal with everything I say that Brandon and I are "dealing with." We try to help her, but she has to experience it first hand.
I want to take her pain away and cast it all onto myself. I wish things worked that way.
God will only deal use a hand we can handle and that same goes for Payton. She continues to struggle with her weight.
Right now we are trying to experience a fasting hypoglycemia attack and take her to the ER for testing.
My anxiety is on full alert while I wait for this next step of testing for Payton. I often second guess myself and think that I should just stop all the testing and let her be, BUT what if this testing would show something that would help her feel better and stop the feedings and her different emotional states.
Brandon and I go by our gut and the love that we have for Payton in our hearts. We haven't regretted any decision that we have made so far and we will continue to be a team and make the decisions that we think is right for our family.
Each and everyday my life is filled with so much love for my family that I feel my heart might explode. Little hands and lips feeling and kissing my face is the best feeling in the world. When Payton wraps her hands around my neck and kisses me is my favorite thing in the world right now. Weston snuggles his little head into the crock of my neck and breathes softly. My husband and I call each several times thoughout the day just to say Hi and I love you!
Who could ask for more? Not me :)
iN tHe EyEs Of JiLl

2010 Christmas Card

With Love Chartreuse Christmas Card

Get custom photo Christmas cards online at Shutterfly.com.

View the entire collection of cards.

Double Bubble

Every Friday night the Country Club in Elkader has double bubble (2 drinks for the price of one). Brandon, Payton and I have been spending time with family and friends on Friday nights. Here are some pictures of Payton with Grandpa Mike and her cousin Mary Ann Donlon.
We also had Holly Purman show up and it was her birthday. She used to babysit Brandon when he was little (I feel sorry for her). Brandon got her a birthday shot and shared it with her. Holly said she would take care of Brandon and tuck him in if he ever needed it :)

free hit counter

Taco Night!

Last night I talked Brandon into going down to Osterdock for Taco night. We were excited that our friends Josh, Heather and there cute little girl Allison were going with us. They place was packed, but the tacos were excellent (the beer I had with my taco was amazing as well)! Payton and her friend, Allison (who was born in Nov.) played like champs on the table while the adults conversed and drank beverages. I forgot that I had my "new" digital camera with me I got for Mother's Day. I was digging in my purse and saw it. I thought, "these are great picture moments of Payton playing with a lifelong friend." Here they are:

free hit counter

Monday Already...

I was not ready for it to be Monday by any means...

Mother's Day was great, but we ran all over. We had a lot of fun going to church with the whole family, then G & G Donlon's. The meal was excellent and everyone loved the "Bender's Salad" I slaved over to make.

Brandon, Payton and I went home to take a snooze before we headed off to Brandon's mom's house for a delicious dinner. Once again, it was an amazing time with good food and family. I even had my morals for the year :) Although it was a great time had by all, today I find myself thinking that I could have just stayed home and played with Payton. That would have been more than good enough for me on Mother's Day. I will have to do that one night this week. Just enjoy some alone time with Payton and Brandon.

Family time is great, but with our large families sometimes we get caught up in their traditions and don't have time for our own. We will have to work on the in the future.

I was surprised Friday night when I got home and Brandon, I mean Payton had a gift all wrapped. Payton told me Daddy took her to Wal-Mart on his day off with her and she got me a present. She got me a digital camera since the hand me down I had finally quit. Payton even wrote out the card in her beautiful scribbles!
So here are some pictures I took yesterday for Mother's Day 2010!

I used picnik.com to edit and make these photos interesting and fun!

free hit counter

Single Mom

My husband got done planting corn last night and only has 120 acres of beans left. I can't wait until he is done and will be home more. Payton and I miss him dearly. There are two times a year when I am on my own. Planting and Harvest....They are a huge part of his job and I completely understand that, but that doesn't mean I always like it. Running errands, CCD, Master's Classes, school meetings, full-time job, etc. are much harder to accomplish on a daily basis since having Payton. With Brandon around to get Payton ready in the morning and help entertain her during supper is huge. It makes my life 50 x easier. Thank goodness he doesn't have a job that requires him to work those hours all year long! I would never make it.

I know it is really hard on Brandon too. He misses Payton terribly during those stressful and busy times as well, and I hope he misses me too! LOL...
He calls just to listen to Payton jabber on the other end. It is so funny, because Payton cries when I hang up the phone and put in on the receiver. She acts like she wasn't done and had more to say!

And Payton....is just like her father! She is full of energy, loving and a turd! When she wants something she will make sure she gets if from you one way or the other. She is demanding, but so damn cute I cave every time!
Payton is crawling all over our house. I have gates up and doors closed, but she still gets into trouble. Brandon forgot to close bathroom door and I came around the corner and she was reaching for the heater (which was on) and scared me half to death.
Last week she crawled off my bed and fell head first onto a plastic tub that was sticking out from under the bed, last month she crawled off our step down to the dining room and busted her lip open! I know this makes me sound like a terrible mom, but with everything she did, she only cried for seconds. I was the one a wreck for days...weeks....on wait..I still am!

free hit counter

Mother/Daughter Banquet

Last night was the Mother/Daughter Banquet at the Country Club in Elkader. It was a lot of fun and the food was excellent! Payton was crawling all over the place and she was so happy to see all her grandma's and her aunts.
Here are some pictures. I had to crop Great Grandma Donlon out of one of them because she looked all blurry like a ghost (hummmmm...). LOL

After nights like these it reminds me how important family is no matter how crazy they are! Put aside the ups and downs life throws you and grab those that are close to you and cherish them with all you have. You never know what is around the corner of life and you don't want to regret anything....

Sponsored by the online education web page.

hit counter html code